SaltPepper (about 18,254 kilo's, depending on your own taste)1 lemon1 wheel barrel of honeyMustard1 bag of wood shavings (preferably snake wood)50 litres of wood glue (the white one)3 oak beamsTools needed:2 of the 3 Sankara stones (they have to be the REAL Indiana stones)The axe from the movie The Shining (again, it has to be the real deal. When I first tried to make this amazing salad dressing, I could not get my hands on the axe and the stones. I thought I could get away with using another axe and some other stones, but boy was I wrong -- I'm still removing splinters from my frontal lobe and cleaning the glue from between my toes! Luckily I found a guy who is able to get his hands on these things; he lives on an isle in the Pacific ccean, so he can only come visit me once every 5 years, and.... sorry I digress)1 empty Jacuzzi1 excavator1 10 pound hammerSo here (or there) we go:Chuck the salt, pepper, mustard, honey and wood shavings in the empty Jacuzzi using the excavator and grind the ingredients with the Sankara stones. Then use the axe to peel the lemon as well as the oak beams. Add to the rest of the ingredients. Use the hammer to mix the ingredients. If you are in a rush you also can use the excavator. Top off with the glue.Bon ap(p)etit!